My father’s eulogy for Kim

At Kim’s funeral we asked people from different parts of Kim’s life to share their thoughts and memories. The first to speak was my father, Ira Steinberg.


We have lost the kindest, most loving, young woman we had ever known.

We remember how nervous she and Daniel were when he first introduced us at a gig where he was announcing in the flats. We talked for a while, then Daniel left the table to do his spot. There was an older man sitting at our table eating and in the short time Daniel was away Kim and the man were engaged in friendly conversation and we had been included as well.  When we were leaving, Daniel said, “That was the owner we were talking with”.  Kim engaged people. We knew she was right for Daniel.  We were going to have a new daughter.

The wedding was in Oberlin in Fairchild Chapel. After some pictures, we were led across the square by a piper to the Oberlin Inn for the reception and dinner. Tom, her father had arranged for the piper.  At the Inn Gerry, her mother introduced us to Kim’s extended family and friends. Everyone was there – Grandpa, brother, sister, uncles, aunts and so many cousins of all ages. Kim had been wrapped in a loving warmth that must have defined the kind of person she would become.

We remember the infant they brought from China. Kim would laughingly remind me for years of the endless repetition (ultimately agonizing) that we sat through of the Richard Scarry Video with Maggie the toddler fascinated by “In an out, over and under, up and down…” And then Maggie grew up with two kind and loving parents to guide her and listen to her and talk with her as she became the beautiful person that she has become.

We remember racing to the hospital with lumps in our stomachs hoping in vain that Elena, still only six, would be there with a smile to greet us. How wrenching that was for Daniel and Kim, for all of us who loved their family. It has been a difficult memory for both of them and especially for Kim. Daniel would recognize when Kim needed to leave a family gathering with no Elena there and ease the way for her to be alone for a while.

Kim and Daniel and Maggie would visit us at the Kendal at Oberlin Community where we had moved and join our circle of  friends (70s to 90s in age) for Sunday brunch. While Maggie and Nate would jabber away in Latin and Daniel would be involved in conversations, Kim would work the table talking with everyone. They were all at ease talking with us old people and old People were at ease with them.

Kim was the most friendly mother, wife and daughter, patient and tender, sometimes to a fault (especially with the dog), a professional at her work as a Speech Therapist, who knew more about her patients than the doctors with whom she worked. She was the one we went to for medical advice. She wrote a set of exercises for me to help my voice get through a severe sinus congestion problem. She knew so much. She was interested in so much and so friendly to all. How could we not grieve at losing so much.

We have lost a daughter.


Published in: on September 5, 2016 at 5:46 pm  Leave a Comment  

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